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10/06/2026

Episode 14: Package Inspection
The Department reminds citizens that delivery to a residential address does not constitute delivery to a specific human.
All incoming materials remain subject to inspection.
Visual examination, scent analysis, and preliminary snack determination may occur before human authorization is obtained.
Interference with an active package inspection may result in additional scrutiny.
The Department appreciates your cooperation.
Explore the Department of Poodle Affairs:
theweberway.com/department-of-poodle-affairs/

09/10/2026

DEPARTMENT OF POODLE AFFAIRS
SPECIAL BULLETIN 05
FIELD MEDICINE

The initial assessment was considerably worse than the patient had anticipated.

Five broken ribs.

One broken clavicle.

One punctured lung.

Brian had known about the clavicle. The rest apparently neglected to identify themselves at the scene.

With no cell service, no clear way to tell rescuers where they were, and roughly two and a half miles separating them from accessible roads, Brian and Dale initially tried to work their way toward help.

A little riding. A stop. Another attempt.

Eventually it became clear that Brian wasn’t getting out that way.

Dale went for help.

After an earlier search of roughly eight houses had found nobody home, this time he returned remarkably quickly with news that help was coming.

Right behind him came a side-by-side carrying two paramedics.

The Department considers their timing excellent.

Brian was moved by side-by-side toward road access, transferred to an ambulance, taken to Franklin Memorial Hospital, and ultimately transferred to Maine Medical Center.

There, the full inventory of damage became considerably clearer.

The Department recognizes determination as an admirable trait.

It would nevertheless like to clarify one important point:

When the conditions change, the plan is allowed to change too.

Sometimes getting yourself out is the plan.

Sometimes the right plan is letting someone come get you.

Management would also like it entered into the record that the human survived all of this only to find himself under the supervision of approximately ten medical professionals.

The Department considered this an encouraging start.

Poodle oversight would follow.

https://theweberway.com/department-bulletins/

06/14/2026

A little over 100 miles on the four-wheeler yesterday.

Apparently I didn't get enough because we're heading back out again today. 😄

Not many complaints from this side of the handlebars.

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